Last weekend, while standing on the frozen ground, waiting for the men’s race at the Cyclocross World Championships, I realized that the annual Rodgau 50K was run that same weekend.

And that’s when I realized I hadn’t raced in a full year, since last year’s 50K.

A full year without a race?  It’s been a while since that’s happened.

And I don’t know what to think about that.

It’s not a bad thing, nor is it a good thing.  It just is what it is.  I really haven’t felt the need to push through more marathons or ultra-marathons.  I really haven’t felt the need to chase a half-marathon PR.  I haven’t felt the need to focus more on bike races.  And without a pool nearby that opens at a reasonable hour (say, before 10am), that leaves swims (and triathlons) out of the picture.

So I haven’t registered for any races.  And without a race on the schedule, my training is pretty non-focused.  I just do what I do.

And I’m actually OK with that right now.

I can still grind the big gears for an hour if I want to.

Then follow it up with a a pretty hard 10K.

I can even still outrun most of the young ‘uns at work.

And that’s a lot of fun.  :^D

Heck, I could even fake my way through a half-marathon tomorrow if I were properly motivated.

But that motivation would require focus.  Focus that I’m lacking right now.

The Wall Street Journal had an interesting article recently covering endurance sport widows.  And I think the article gets to the core of my lack of focus.

I told Goddess that I won’t train/race anymore Ironman-distance tri’s until after I retire.  It just takes too much time away from her, especially those 5-7 hour training Saturdays.

I haven’t told her, but right now I have no desire to train for the marathons and ultra-marathons mainly because I don’t want her to have to see me step out the door for a 3.5-hour run on Saturday and a 90-minute run on Sunday, almost every week.

Lately (the last few months), I’ve either been out of the house for work averaging 13-hours each day.  Granted, that includes my bicycle commute to and from work, but that commute isn’t much longer than if I drove it every day.

So I already spend too much time away from her.

Mind you, she’s extremely supportive, understanding that I need to be doing something.  Even during some of my more reckless endeavors she’s been there supporting me, even if it means getting up at ungodly hours to drive to a race, then sleeping in the car while I run through the mud in a cold pouring rain.

And tolerates me when I say “I’m going to do that again”.

That’s just one reason why she’s a Goddess.

So I don’t have anything scheduled for this year either.  Unless I run across something that really piques my interest.

But something tells me that I’ll be spending way too much time away from Goddess as it is, so I’m not looking too hard.

5 thoughts on “Rudderless”

  1. So true, so true!! I’m lucky the hubs is so supportive of me, carries all my crap around at races, puts up with my “fits” of freaking out before a race, me saying I’m never doing that ever again, then changing my mind a week later, and I could go on and on.

  2. I support your direction. The competition might be a good way of getting into shape… but past all of that, you still have a life to lead, and a beautiful partner to live with. You don’t want to back yourself into a corner. Sport and fitness should continue, but with a certain moderation.

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